Middle Age is a Gift - Embrace It!

According to the Oxford English dictionary, I am officially middle aged. How did that happen? I'm still waiting to feel like an adult. Sure, my hair is graying, I discover new wrinkles every day, and parts of me have sagged to new lows, but strangely I'm happier with myself than I've ever been. Now that I'm in my third quarter of life, I'm okay with who I am - but the road to get here wasn't easy. Here are the benefits that come with middle age:

I no longer care what everyone thinks. This in itself is a miracle. I spent most of my teens and twenties consumed with worry over what people thought about the way I looked, what I said, my friends, my family, etc. Even if I didn't like someone, I still wanted them to like me. What a colossal waste of time. Now, if people like me, that's great, if they don't, that's okay too. I know who I am and I know who I'm not and no one can convince me otherwise.

I no longer allow negative, toxic people to have a place in my life. This was a tough one. But if every interaction that you have with someone leaves you feeling worse, rather than better, you need to get them out of your life. It's really hard to get someone to change the way they treat you, particularly if they don't see anything wrong with it. Even if the negative people in your life are relatives that you think you're stuck with, you can limit your exposure to them. I've learned to surround myself with positive, supportive friends and family members and when I talk to them I feel like I've had a warm hug. I still have a few cranks in my life, but they're not always negative, and they do keep me humble.

I say "no" early and often. It really is okay to say no - people will not hate you for it. I used to feel that I had to accept every party invitation I could so that I wouldn't hurt the feelings of the host or hostess. Finally, I was invited to a party the day after Christmas, when I was partied out. It required me to bring a dish, something for the hostess, and to drive a long way in the rain. So, I just said no, thank you, I can't. That's it. The world didn't end, nobody hated me, and life went on. It was a revelation. Now, I just say no as soon as I can, without any excuses or fibs.

The body I had in my twenties is not coming back, and that's okay. I might not be a bikini model, but I'm healthy, and that's what's most important. My body has given birth to two beautiful, healthy children, nursed babies, comforted people in pain, and danced in the rain. I can still run up a flight of stairs, swim in the ocean, and chase after little kids. Staying is shape is much, much harder, but I owe it to my family to stick around as long as I can.

At this point in my life, I still see a world of possibilities. I have dreams I plan on making come true, and I've learned to let go of the ones that required sacrifices I didn't want to make. I make mistakes all the time, but I forgive myself, just as I forgive others. Will I still have this attitude in ten years? Maybe not, but I'm going to enjoy all I have while I have it.